| "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." | | | | The need to avoid emotional discomfort can make the |
| This famous quote from Franklin Roosevelt speaks as | | | | intrinsic loneliness of leadership unbearable. Leaders |
| clearly to leaders today as it did in the 1940s. In their | | | | who attempt to maintain constant emotional comfort |
| book, Play to Win, Larry and Hersch Wilson present | | | | become cut off from their own emotions and unable |
| psychologist Maxie Maultsby's concept of the Four | | | | to respond appropriately to the emotions of others. It is |
| Fatal Fears. Maultsby believes these fears impede our | | | | almost impossible for leaders to make difficult |
| ability to interact effectively with others and take | | | | decisions when they are paralyzed by the fear of |
| relevant action. These fears can not only immobilize us, | | | | others' emotional responses. |
| but also immobilize an entire organization when a | | | | Summary |
| leader is stuck in their grip. Let's take a look at the | | | | When leaders act out of fear, their actions and |
| impact of these Four Fatal Fears on a leader's ability | | | | decisions are guarded and restrictive. These leaders |
| to create a dynamic organization that responds quickly | | | | tend to focus on controlling others, rather than |
| and effectively to change, creates new and innovative | | | | managing themselves. The leaders' fears and anxieties |
| solutions, and works toward a common vision. | | | | are transmitted to their organizations, which creates |
| I fear failure; therefore, I need to succeed. | | | | dependency, indecisiveness and lack of personal |
| When leaders operate from a fear of failure, they are | | | | responsibility. These shared fears can replace the |
| often reluctant to act. They may procrastinate in | | | | firm's shared values and lead to ethical lapses, poor |
| making decisions and miss opportunities. It impedes | | | | and untimely decisions, ineffective communication and |
| their sense of adventure and playfulness, as well as | | | | dysfunctional relationships. To face and manage these |
| their ability to take the risks necessary for innovation | | | | fears, leaders must remain honest with themselves |
| and growth. A fear of failure can manifest itself as a | | | | regarding their most prevalent fear and the conditions |
| need to have every piece of available information | | | | that are most likely to provoke that fear. |
| before making a decision. Leaders who fear failure | | | | Awareness is the first step to self-management, so |
| can become imaginatively stuck and in the constant | | | | here are some exercises to help you determine how |
| mode of finding answers, rather than reframing | | | | fear has an impact on your leadership. Choose the |
| questions. Their thinking can become polarized into | | | | exercise that you feel is most beneficial and revealing. |
| black-and-white or all-or-nothing approaches that limit | | | | Then, try it for a week and see how it adds clarity to |
| creativity and risk-taking. | | | | your actions. |
| I fear being wrong; therefore, I must be right. | | | | I fear failure; therefore, I must succeed. |
| For leaders, the fear of being wrong can make it | | | | For the next week, stop twice each day -- once at |
| extremely difficult to tolerate members of their | | | | midday and once at end of day -- and ask yourself |
| management team who challenge their ideas or | | | | the following questions:o What did I not attempt today |
| conclusions. Over time, dissenting voices become quiet | | | | because I was afraid I would fail?o How did I |
| and the management team becomes nothing more | | | | rationalize not trying?o What was the worst outcome |
| than a rubber stamp for the leader's thinking. The | | | | that could have come out of my trying?o What did not |
| creativity and imagination of the team is lost to the | | | | move forward because I did not try?o What did I learn |
| leader and the business. Ultimately, leaders' fear of | | | | about myself and my leadership from this experience? |
| being wrong leads to an increased likelihood that they | | | | I fear being wrong; therefore, I need to be right. |
| will be wrong. Leaders who need to be right tend to | | | | For the next week, stop twice each day -- once at |
| dominate discussions and attempt to control the | | | | midday and once at end of day -- and ask your self |
| thinking of others, rather than see others as resources | | | | the following questions:o In what situation did I feel the |
| who can expand their understanding of issues and | | | | need to be right or to avoid being wrong?o How did I |
| opportunities. | | | | respond?o How did other people respond to me?o |
| I fear rejection; therefore, I need to be accepted. | | | | How could I have responded that would have been |
| Fear of rejection makes it difficult for leaders to take a | | | | more useful?o What did I learn about myself and my |
| stand and define themselves in situations where | | | | leadership from this experience? |
| relationships feel endangered. Leaders who fear | | | | I fear rejection; therefore, I need to be accepted. |
| rejection seldom confront the poor performance of | | | | For the next week, stop twice each day -- once at |
| subordinates or challenge the thinking of others in a | | | | midday and once at end of day -- and ask yourself |
| way that promotes lively discussion and debate. These | | | | the following questions:o In what situation did I feel |
| leaders tend to rely exclusively on a consensus | | | | rejected today?o How did I respond?o How could I |
| decision-making style because they believe it is more | | | | have responded more effectively to stay |
| important to be liked than respected. Fearing rejection, | | | | connected?o What situation did I avoid today because |
| leaders often try to present themselves in a way that | | | | I was afraid of rejection?o What was the result of my |
| is palatable to everyone, except them. This leads to | | | | avoidance?o How could I have engaged that |
| stress, burnout and lack of confidence. More | | | | person?o What did I learn about myself and my |
| introverted leaders deal with the fear of rejection by | | | | leadership from this experience? |
| pulling away from relationships and cutting themselves | | | | I fear being emotionally uncomfortable; therefore, I |
| off from the very people with whom they desire | | | | need to be comfortable. |
| connection. | | | | For the next week, stop twice each day -- once at |
| I fear being emotionally uncomfortable; therefore, I | | | | midday and once at end of day -- and ask yourself |
| need to be comfortable. | | | | the following questions:o What made me emotionally |
| When leaders need emotional comfort, they lack the | | | | uncomfortable today?o Why was I uncomfortable?o |
| capacity to remain present and engaged when faced | | | | What did I do to avoid or eliminate the discomfort?o |
| with resistance or anger from others. They tend to | | | | What did not get resolved because I avoided |
| avoid emotionally charged discussions, and therefore, | | | | discomfort?o What did I learn about myself and my |
| miss the opportunity for mutual learning and growth. | | | | leadership from this experience? |