Take Control of Your Relationship - The Four Things You Must Do Today

Is it time to take control of your relationship? Do youthere are things upon which you violently disagree, then
feel respected as an equal, or do you feel you're justyou need to deal with that too - decide that those
there to rubber stamp his decisions? Is your individualitythings are off limits.
and independence allowed to flourish, or has it been3. Form Good Habits
squashed down? A truly healthy relationship is aRelationships get out of balance for many reasons.
partnership of equals - if that isn't the case, you couldSometimes it's because one partner has a more
be heading for trouble, sooner rather than later.controlling personality, but more often it's just down to
Fortunately, there are four simple things you can do tolaziness or habit. If it's easier for you to let your partner
restore the balance and take control of yourtake control, then naturally, he'll take control. You've
relationship, starting today.basically given him permission to do so.
1. Set BoundariesTake control of your relationship by renegotiating that
Taking back control doesn't mean becominggeneral permission. Say "no" once in a while. Make a
passive-aggressive or refusing to cooperate. That justdecision about where to have dinner, or whose
skews the balance in the other direction. It does meanparents to visit over the holidays.
setting clear boundaries. Some things will be your4. Give Each Other Space
choice and responsibility, some things will be his, andWhen you're in each other's lives too much, the law of
some things will be mutual. You just need to identify"familiarity breeds contempt" comes into play. To take
them, make them clear and most importantly, stick toback control, you need to take back your life away
them.from the relationship. This doesn't mean going off on a
2. Agree To Disagreeround the world trip by yourself, but you can assert
In a similar way, it's important to identify those areassome independence by forming your own social circle
upon which you can agree to disagree. There's neverand developing your own interests.
been a relationship in the history of the world whereIf you don't take control of your relationship, the price
the partners agreed on 100% of things 100% of thecan be high. Don't become a victim of powerlessness
time. The most successful relationships recognize this,and resentment.
and deal with it in a healthy and respectful way. If